Here I Am

To help you overcome the fear of being seen that growing up in a narcissistic family creates.

Step 1: Make a List of Actions That Involve Being Seen

These should be things that make you feel uncomfortable, but not overwhelmed.

Examples:

– Sharing a personal win with a friend
– Updating your LinkedIn profile
– Posting something small on social media
– Speaking up in a meeting

There are a million different options — don’t overthink it.

Just write down as many as you can think of.

Step 2: Pick One Action and Do It

Choose one item from your list and take that action.

This step might bring up discomfort — mentally or physically.

That’s normal. It’s your nervous system trying to protect you.

Before you begin, have one or two grounding tools ready.

These are simple techniques that help you feel more present and connected to your body when you start to feel overwhelmed.

Examples:

– The 5-4-3-2-1 Method:

Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.

– Deep Breathing:

Focus on your breath. Count your inhales and exhales.

Slow them down to signal safety to your body.

These are just two options — there are many more.

So take some time to Google “grounding techniques” and find the ones that work best for you.

Step 3: Reflect on What Happened

Grab something to write or type with, and answer the following:

– What did I do?
– How did it go?
– How did it feel?
– What can I take away from this?

The goal is to start collecting proof that being visible doesn’t always lead to negative consequences.

The more often you take small actions and reflect on them, the more you teach your body that visibility doesn’t have to feel unsafe anymore.